Thursday, November 21, 2002

do as i say, not as i do - canada's energy minister, herb dhaliwal, has been recently pushing for his country's ratification of the kyoto climate change treaty. if implemented, the kyoto protocol would require countries to reduce emissions of greenhouse gases suspected of contributing to global warming.

So what does Canada's natural resources minister drive when he's not pushing ratification of the Kyoto climate change protocol? Minister Herb Dhaliwal confessed that, well, he has two Volvos and two sport utility vehicles -- General Motors 4x4s, to be precise. One pair for Ottawa and one pair for his home in Vancouver.

this is typical liberal behavior. it is perfectly all right for the rest of you to shiver in the winter, drive ricketly little cars, and sweat bullets in the summer. but heck, why in the world should I, a liberal minister, do any of that stuff I voted for? folks it is time to start paying attention to what your representatives say, but more importantly what they actually do.

Wednesday, November 20, 2002

weight watchers - jenny and i are on one of those high-fat, low carbohydrate diets that have recently been in the news. we've stopping eating bread, rice, pasta, cereal, juice and sweets while increasing the amount of eggs, cheese and meat in our diet. after around a week on the diet, i've already lost 4 pounds. it's really pretty amazing to be on a diet where you eat a big wedge of cheese if you are hungry.

for breakfast, i'll have around 4 strips of bacon and 2 eggs. for lunch, it's usually a hamburger--sans bun--and some veggies. and then for diinner, jenny usually prepares some meat along with some more veggies. as a snack, i'll have a piece of fruit or some cheese. i'll have to admit that my body knows that something is different about this diet--i had a low-grade headache for the first three or four days of this diet. luckily, i'm feeling better now.

i have some incentive for losing weight. jenny says that if i go down to 170 lbs., she'll go to las vegas with me. i'm really trying hard this time.

Tuesday, November 19, 2002

So Many Lies - Give Bill Clinton credit for being consistent. Not only was he a liar in the Oval Office, but he is apparently also a cheater on the golf course. The Orange County Register reports that Clinton recently hacked his way through a pro-am tournament in Orange County by invoking mulligans galore and playing by his own set of rules.

The man is pathetic. He cheats at golf, cheats at life, cheats on his wife, his party, his Presidency, his country and his family. His golf game is a metaphor for his life - short cuts, dishonesty, lack of talent and unwillingness to invest even minimal effort to learn something new. Clinton should have had OJ Simpson as a golfing partner. Then the two of them could have gone looking for women to hack together.

I wonder if he has a Secret Service flunky run ahead after he hits a shot, and place the ball closer to the hole for him. I can't imagine a worse job than being a Secret Service agent assigned to this pile of worthless dung.

Sunday, November 17, 2002

Weekend Update - We spent most of Sunday at Jenny's sister's house in San Jose for our nephew Andrew's one month birthday party. Most of Jenny's sisters were there, as were her aunts and uncles on the father's side. Russell had a similar party when he turned one month old. Following Chinese tradition, Jenny's mom made a pungent concoction of picked pigs' feet, ginger and eggs that all of the older generation eats like birthday cake at a Western-style celebration. I didn't eat much because I don't like pigs' feet and also because I am on a diet (once again).

The good news is that all of Jenny's aunts and uncles think I am a good father, given Russell's good health and jolly nature. The bad news is that I have no viable job prospects for the near future. Part of the problem is that I don't have much time for job-hunting during the weekdays when I am minding Russell. But as luck would have it, Jenny's mom just got laid off from her job and will be taking over baby-sitting duties at the beginning of December. Wish me luck.

Wednesday, November 13, 2002

I Smell a Lawsuit - The American Public Health Association is recommending that restaurants and food companies use 50% less salt in processed foods and restaurant meals, a change that the group says could save 150,000 lives a year from strokes and other heart-related ailments. Each year, nearly one million Americans die from heart disease or stroke, which would make salt one of the leading causes of premature death in the US. If this happens to be true, then expect a wave of lawsuits to hit the Morton Salt Company, Chili's, Hot Pockets and any other food businesses that are part of the Vast Salt Shaker Conspiracy.

``Americans are consuming an ever-increasing amount of processed foods high in sodium at home, at work, at school and in restaurants,'' said Dr. Stephen Havas, the lead author of the new policy. ``The excess sodium in these foods is unnecessary and leads to a large, preventable toll of hypertension, premature death and disability.''

The key word here is "preventable", a word that draws trial lawyers like dog shit attracts flies. If they can sue manufacturers of cigarettes, fatty foods, guns and the Ford Pinto, then expect a class action suit before the Bush administration begins the process of tort reform. I say, take the APHA's advice with a grain of salt (figuratively speaking, of course).

Tuesday, November 12, 2002

Dead or Alive? - That is the 25 million dollar question as yet another audio tape purporting to be of the terrorist leader Osama Bin Laden surfaced recently on the Al-Jazeera television network. I still think he's dead. I say enough already with the fuzzy-sounding audiotape routine. It seems like every month or two we hear some new reports of OBL's disembodied, purported voice coming from out of nowhere.

Even if OBL is sick or recovering from injuries, his legitimate appearance would buoy the terrorists immensely. And it would be easy to do. All you need is a regular consumer-type video camera, and a newspaper or television news broadcast to prove the date. But there was no video on the first anniversary of 9-11 or at any other time, and the few tapes issued since the last legitimate tape are suspect, because they didn't have any proof of a date. We know that the last video we saw of him in November 2001 revealed a useless arm, or at least an arm that he never moved, and he was drawn looking and colorless. He looked very ill at that time and I would imagine that he is worse now, and probably dead.

If he is alive, why doesn't he make a tape of himself singing holiday songs to his goat..."On the first day of Ramadan, my Mullah gave to me, an AK-47 in a date tree."

Monday, November 11, 2002

Double Vision - As Jenny and I watch Russell grow up, we've noticed that the double eyelids on his eyes sometimes disappear. Sometimes, it appears only on one eye (left or right) or it disappears completely from both eyes. I think it's interesting that Russell can change the appearance of his eyes after a long nap or when he cries a lot.

For those of you not in the know, many Asians consider double eyelids--the folds on top of the eye--desirable because they give the eye a larger, more Western appearance. It's fairly common in Asians, but those with double eyelids are definitely in the minority. As a result of these factors, double eyelid surgery is the most-performed cosmetic surgical procedure in the world and the third most common in the United States. I personally know at least three people who've had the operation.

The notion that Asians prefer a more Western look for their eyes and are willing to undergo surgery for vanity's sake has sparked some controversy in the Asian-American community. Some believe that the procedure is an attempt to hide or deny one's Asian heritage by conforming to Western ideals of beauty. A large majority of those undergoing the procedure are women, and therefore face the scrutiny of their peers.

In our family, I have a double eyelid while Jenny does not. Personally, I don't care if Jenny or Russell has a double eyelid. As I crooned to Jenny on our wedding day: "Don't go changing, to try to please me...I love you just the way you are."

Wednesday, November 06, 2002

Toys For Twats - According to the Cornell Daily Sun, Cornell University’s health center is considering making vibrators available in on-campus dispensaries. The vibrator craze is being led by Somjen Frazer, a member of the Cornell Women’s Health Initiative. Frazer told the Cornell Daily Sun:

"At this point, you either go online or to the sort of scary and not very woman-affirming sex-shop downtown." Frazer says that one of the key benefits of having on-campus provision of vibrators is that "the dispensary will give out educational materials explaining how to properly clean a vibrator that two women are going to share."

This is what the feminist movement has come to -- promoting the sharing and cleaning of vibrators in lesbian sex. Susan B. Anthony would be so proud. Christopher Dial, a student activist known for his support of student-funded drag shows, proclaimed:

"I think this is a very productive move because the sex industry is associated with back alleys, black boxes, and seedy sales people."

Who knows how many people have died because of back alley masturbation? How long will it be until we hear tales of botched masturbation with unsanitary vegetables? The horror! Vibrators need to be safe, legal, and rare.

Then again, maybe college women will react just like Cornell student Sara Jacobs, who capsulated the current state of the feminist movement when she told the Sun:

"I think one of the most important things is for women to be able to get themselves off."

Big Night - What an amazing night for George W. Bush and the Republicans! Historically, the party that captures the presidency almost always loses seats in the next Congressional election, an average of 30 House seats and 10 Senate seats. Once again, Bush 43 has managed to defy the "experts" in the media by retaking the Senate and adding to the Republican majority in the House of Representatives. I would also add that Jeb Bush easily won re-election as Governor of Florida. This is a crushing defeat for Bill Clinton's New Democratic Party. The lamps & ashtrays are flying in Chappaqua tonight!

Today's election results show that Bush really won the 2000 election. The entire ballot controversy in Florida was nothing but a construct of the DNC and its co-conspirators. With the help of the liberal mass media, they tried to convince the rest of the nation that the Florida election was stolen. Today, the American (and Florida) electorate spoke out in no uncertain terms that the 2000 election really did belong to George Bush.

God bless America, and good night.

Sunday, November 03, 2002

what's going on - these past three weekends, we've spent much of our time driving around san francisco, san jose and oakland to visit family and friends. schelpping russell around is exhausting--there's so much to do when you're on the road with a baby. plus i have to do all of the driving... today is the first weekend day in a while that we've had to ourselves and i am loving it. i did some shopping and cleaning up around the house, but otherwise it was a relaxing day.

tomorrow, november 4th, is our 2nd wedding anniversary. how things have changed in our lives since we took the plunge two years ago. i think my life is better now that i am married. except for that job thing. i have some prospects for work, but nothing definite. hopefully, i won't have to support my family by working as a wal-mart cashier.